Replace Me
by Ironic-Sarcasm
Summary: "Am I a replacement for Riku?" "You can't replace what you can't love." RikuSora Roxas


**A/N:** Oh… my… God…. The world is going to end! I wrote a Rira fanfiction! HOLY COW!! I really HATE that pairing (flame all you want, it won't change my opinion) but its all part of a much bigger plot.

For my old readers, if you bother to read this, you may notice a change in my writing style. Right now, I'm just experimenting. I'm sure it'll change back after a few more fanfics. xD

BTW: I came up with this title on the spot. You can flame that. I suck at titles.

ABTW: I don't own most of the characters mentioned here. I wanna own Roxas, though....

**Replace Me**

Roxas watched from his perch on the Paopu Tree as Sora and Riku sparred, using Keyblades instead of wooden swords. Riku… his silver hair shining in the sunlight and Roxas wondered why it didn't reflect like a mirror. And there was Sora with that big, goofy grin on his face that Roxas sometimes found himself replicating just from memories of being Sora.

Sora had asked Roxas if he wanted to join them and the blond only smiled and shook his head. No, he didn't want to join Sora. He would much rather be in Sora's place.

After both teens were worn, they accompanied Roxas on the tiny island that went off of the bigger, but still small, island. They flopped in the sand, a sheen of sweat sticking to their skin, and Sora chatted happily as Riku laughed along. Roxas tuned them out as he watched the silver-haired man. His muscular arms, his hard face, his soft, teal eyes… Roxas shook those thoughts from his head. These weren't his thoughts….

Sora. Sora. Sora. It was all Sora. Roxas, heartless Roxas, resented his Somebody. He could _feel_. And he was too stupid to even realize his true emotions. He always said he loved _Kairi_. He may have, once in a past life, but that wasn't the case as of today. Roxas knew those eyes that looked at Riku. They didn't look at Kairi like that.

And, every time Sora would talk about Kairi like that, a hardened expression came to Riku's face and he would force a smile and Roxas would look on in pity.

Roxas was not Sora.

Then, something happened. A hoard of Heartless appeared and Roxas, Sora, and Riku fought with all of their might to protect the island and its people. One of the three were weak and he lost his Heart.

Only when all of the Heartless were gone did Sora allow himself to cry as he clutched to Roxas. Riku was gone! Riku lost his Heart! His best friend would never—

A Shadow approached them as it stood upright, twitching its antenna. It just stood there, watching. Roxas looked on with a curious expression, not real curiosity, no he couldn't feel that, and addressed the Heartless as

"Riku?"

Sora turned to the Shadow as he pulled himself away from Roxas and moved toward the creature, genuinely curious. He repeated Roxas's interest with legitimate concern. The Shadow inched closer; its golden orbs only had eyes for Sora. Roxas watched as Sora crouched before it, poking the bulbous head and the Heartless twitched angrily in Sora's direction, making the boy laugh and confirming that it was Riku. Tears were wiped away and the Shadow was collected into Sora's arms and snuggled, brushing his lips across the space between the antennas.

Roxas stood frozen, unable to do anything but watch as, in a flash of light, Riku appeared, holding Sora in those strong arms. Lips were pressed together and Roxas ran. He didn't want to see it! He didn't want to have to know about it! He didn't want to have to _think_ about that! Riku… Riku…

If Roxas could feel, he would feel one of two emotions: Sadness or numbness. Roxas thought he might prefer the latter. With numbness, he didn't feel anything; it would be like it always was.

When Roxas could run no longer, he dropped into the sandy beach and knew that he was defeated. Sora won. Riku finally had the boy he loved for years and Roxas would never be part of his life the way he wanted to.

Doodling in the sand, Roxas lost track of the time and forgot what he drew as soon as he erased it. One particular drawing jumped out at him as he made to scratch it out.

Nobody.

Opening a portal, Roxas ran into the darkness and came out into Twilight Town, just beyond the gate to the mansion. No one was around, Roxas found and he ran into the town, searching, searching, until he found what he was looking for and a smile crept its way to his lips.

Seifer was addressing a man with his friends, Rai, Fuu, and Vivi standing behind him, Rai cracking his knuckles threateningly.

Upon a closer look, the silver-haired man was trembling and he didn't seem like a man at all, but rather a boy. Roxas cut between the two, glaring at Seifer with faux anger.

"What's going on here?"

"What does it matter to you, loser?"

And Roxas punched him before taking the hand of the boy behind him and running into another black portal he created, closing it before the friends could look up to see where they went. They could search for weeks and never find either, thought Roxas with a smirk as he pulled the silver-haired boy onto the beaches of Destiny Island and turned to give him a good look.

He looked exactly like Riku, only with a rounder, boyish face and larger, cute eyes.

"I-I'm sorry!"

He cried eyes wide with fear and nerves.

"I-I was just t-trying to ask w-who I w-was and he s-started yelling at me!"

Tenderly, Roxas caressed his face and told him everything would be alright. Yes, he wouldn't have a name yet, so Roxas gave him one.

Roo-_shik_. Ruxik. Riku's name, mixed around, with an X somewhere in there. Traditional for a Nobody.

Sitting on the beach, Roxas explained what they were and where they came from. The boy—Roxas could help but think he was one—seemed like he didn't like the idea much, but stuck with Roxas anyway.

It was days before Roxas finally took Ruxik to Riku and Sora. Sora was happy to meet a new friend and was all smiles.

Riku took Roxas aside and told him he didn't want anything to do with his Nobody.

And Roxas took Ruxik under his wing, protecting him from the evils of the world and his own Somebody.

He told Ruxik everything he wanted to know. He taught him to fight, to protect himself, and everything that Roxas knew. But, he was still a naïve, cute kid.

When Ruxik smiled, his eyes lit up with unreal excitement and Roxas couldn't help but kiss him. The first time caught both of them by surprise, and now the boy knew to expect it, but didn't resist.

The first time Ruxik cried was when he asked about Riku and Roxas gave him a straight answer. Why didn't Riku want him? Roxas didn't know. Was Sora as reluctant as Riku? No, Sora was his best friend until he came along.

And Roxas kissed him tenderly; feeling the salty tears mixing with their saliva as Roxas gently pushed the boy onto his back, straddling him.

"I want to love you."

He whispered softly into the ear of the slightly older-looking boy, making him shiver beneath him.

And it wasn't a complete lie.

Roxas did everything in his power to keep Ruxik "happy" after that. He would smile and hold his hand and kiss him and pretend that they could feel the love they shared. Roxas was the dominant one in the relationship. He instigated everything they did.

Roxas had made their relationship physical. And he found it was the closest he could ever get to "feeling" anything.

Tongues danced, hands roamed, throats vibrated as they _moaned_.

In the Secret Place… Sora and Riku had caught them in their act, sweaty, bare, and in their fake passion. They instantly pulled apart as Riku started yelling at them. Roxas yelled back as Ruxik clung to him, crying.

"What's so wrong with wanting to _feel_ something?!"

Riku convinced Sora that their Nobodies were nothing but trouble. No, they weren't trouble—they were _nothing_. And Roxas watched, longingly, as they couple left the cave, an arm wrapped around Sora's waist as the brunette glanced over his shoulder, as if in second thought, before they left.

Tilting that cute head up to face him, Ruxik stared at Roxas for a long time and he let him with his naked arms wrapped around that strong body. Roxas was caught in his own thoughts of…

"Roxas?"

He looked down at the boy in his arms that looked up with that trademark lost puppy look. Smiled tenderly and pecked his forehead.

"Am I a replacement for Riku?"

"You can't replace what you can't love."


End file.
